New Year's Resolutions

These are my 2015 resolutions

• Walk outside every day


• Exercise for 30 minutes daily


• Journal daily


• Draw daily


• Intervene in negative spirals


• Vote! Volunteer! Be politically active!


• Study smarter and more regularly


• Ask for help


• Take photos


• Local or organic food

I feel like every year the resolutions are the same. But as I said in May 2014: "These habits are about long term wisdom rather than short term results." So it's okay that the goals keep showing up; some of these are about life long habits and goals.

Get out of the apartment everyday

Meditation

Listen to my body

Walk or exercise for 30 minutes daily

Eat something when hungry

Eat at least 1 healthy meal each day

Journal daily

Wake up and sleep at a regular time

I mean, you can even go back to 2013 and find some of the same resolutions!



Progress is happening. It's amazing to think how much has improved in my life over the course of a few years. I feel so much more in control of my life; I feel like I'm finally in a place to start giving back and helping others. I know myself as a person much better - I feel comfortable expressing who I am and who I want to be. I have the space and security to do so as well.

As far as concrete improvement:

I've definitely improved a regular sleep cycle. Like, a drastic improvement. I am up most days at 7 or 8am. In bed by midnight or earlier. This really helps to balance my moods. I've found that it's best to keep the same schedule no matter what the external needs are. Also, I need my morning tea. I'm absolutely useless until noon without it. My push goal is to track my productivity over the course of a day to find my best hours. 

I've been cooking for myself and eating healthy for almost a year now. I've tried the organic local delivery thing. I did and am still doing the bring your lunch to work thing. I've cut back significantly on delivery food. At this point, almost all of my food is either local or organic. It's great for my mood, health, and budget. My goal is to lock in on ALL of it either local or organic. 

I blog twice weekly most of the year with occasional breaks. I'm really proud of the changes and improvements I've made in my blog, slow and steady. I think the quality of my writing has improved; I've started focusing on political and topical subjects. I want this blog to be useful to me and others too. I'd like to really launch the blog in 2015. I think the one thing I really want to focus on is adding images to my blog. 

I'm living on my own and supporting myself. I think I'd need pages to describe what a difference this has made in my quality and control of life. I feel so proud of being and knowing me at last. I'd like to stretch myself to improve on the things I love to do.

I'm dressing and looking how I want. Over on facebook, I have a post about the 4 years of hair changes: blue hair, long hair, short hair, curly hair, keratin hair! I've embraced my natural curly hair and my current color. I'd still like to try being a red head! I'm also wearing more bright colors and jewelry. I've also been trying different make up looks and totally fallen in love with gold and blue eye liner.  I've written that I feel better when I look better. I love the surprised exclamations from my friends, Are your eyes really lined with gold!?! There have of course been mistakes and strange things, but I love that too. It's fun to learn and explore what does and doesn't work for an outfit or style. But most of all, I love that I am expressing myself. I'd like to start exercising so that I can express my self - my own body - more. 

Habits in review

Habits are an important part of maintaining your mental and physical health. While habits may often make you think of phrases like "stuck in a rut" or "mindless routine," habits can in fact be much more than that. Habits can be simple acts of maintenance or more complex commitments to personal interrogation. Keeping myself accountable with habits has made a big change in my life and I hope that you too can use them both to improve yourself and to catch yourself before you fall.

Here are a mix of my healthy habits, those that maintain and those that help me grow.

Maintenance

Most of my maintenance is daily. I've noticed that when I fail to take care of these tasks, things start to fall apart. Taking care of little things on a regular basis can mean that you have the good health to take care of bigger things. For example, in my old dorm, a lot of students didn't eat healthy. A few barely even ate at all! They could just never find the time. Because of this, colds and other types of sick would spread really easily. Those who were already weak from lack of eating would totally fall apart, with their health and their studies. Taking the half hour to sit down for a meal is better in the long run! It took me a while to learn how to take care of myself and to even go so far as take extra vitamin C right before a bug got big. Paying attention to my body and my needs on a regular basis: that's what maintenance is really about. These habits are about long term wisdom rather than short term results. 

• Get out of the apartment everyday
• Meditation
• Listen to my body
• Walk or exercise for 30 minutes daily
• Eat something when hungry
• Eat at least 1 healthy meal each day
• Journal daily
• Wake up and sleep at a regular time

Growth

Once you have yourself in good shape, doing your maintenance on a regular basis, you can move forward to growing! Growing for me is about making sure that my goals and day to day life are in alignment. This can mean things like having a brunch chat with an old friend: I make sure that I am maintaining a connection that I enjoy. I give back to them and help them while enjoying some yummy food. I also can, by talking with a good friend, find out more about myself and the world around me. This is a small act of growth. It becomes a habit to look for ways to grow

• Review: Does your work lead you towards your goals? Do you know where you are headed?
• Interrogate: Does this right now make you happy? These people, this place, this work?
• Respond: Do you take responsibility for what you control? Do you adapt?
• Relax: Do you feel rested? Recharged? 

Barometer

Habits can also serve as a barometer of how you're feeling. I can now catch myself when I'm just starting to get ill because I may really feel like going to bed a lot earlier or sleeping in. These sorts of barometer moments can be useful for catching problems before they escalate. For example, when I'm feeling tired in the morning, I may take extra care to eat well for the next few days with a focus on staying well. While it may not be efficient to form a habit just to catch a problem, sometimes these things are easily linked. More likely you'll just need time because those sorts of thing reveal themselves.

Good luck forming new habits!

Affirmation of Sadness

While we may not need to cry that often, I think a lot of us struggle to let the tears flow. But it's really important to have a good cry when you feel the need to.

Sometimes when we cry, we feel weak or guilty for expressing out emotions. For women, it can be seen as a long expected sign of weakness to cry in the wrong setting. Men are often discouraged from expressing their emotions so tears can be a scary prospect. But all of us have emotions, no matter how strong of a front we put forward.

Here's a set of affirmations that I have been giving myself when I feel the need to cry. I hope that they help you or can serve as a resource for times of trouble. Please always keep in mind that things can get better and there are resources for help.

• It's okay to be scared to cry. Strong emotions can be scary and unfamiliar, but these emotions are part of you. What's really scary is trying to keep these emotions back where they can fester. 

• There's no reason not to cry. It doesn't matter if someone hears you. It doesn't matter if other people don't need to cry. It doesn't matter if the reason you're crying is small. Think about how many tears were shed over the Titanic: if you feel the need to cry, surely your emotional health is just as worthy as a silly movie.

• You deserve the right to be sad. 
• You deserve the space to cry.
• You deserve the time to feel emotions, good and bad.

• Confronting your emotions is a necessary part of moving forward. There's no way to have emotions go away without dealing with them. 

• Crying because you are frustrated, sad, or angry is all valid. There are many reasons why people cry. Whatever your reason it is valid. 

And finally...

• Tomorrow will be better.

Finding inspiration for creativity: 5 ways

Here are a few ways that I find inspiration, especially for things like drawing and writing.

1) Collect cool things

I use tumblr to collect cool images to draw over at my art blog, ichoosetorefuse. All the images there fall within a certain aesthetic so when I need to get into that mood, I just head there to immerse myself. From there, it's a simple matter of finding the right image that clicks. I also keep clippings of my favorite magazines and articles.

You can use pintrest, flicker, or any other site to collect your cool things. Do try to sort those things as you gather them.

2) Find a inspirational place

Walking through the city on your way to work, you spot a bench in a park that you've never sat down in before. Take the time later that week to sit in the bench- or whatever places are calling out to you.

The places that offer me the most inspiration are:

• independent cafes (tea preferred)
• sections of museums with pretty portraits
• benches next to flower shops
• busy diner counters
• off rush hour train cars

You'll probably notice that these places have people moving through them but don't require me to interact with others. Most of these places don't require me to get up and move a lot; once I get into my rhythms of writing or drawing, I won't be interrupted but I can look up and around to find something interesting. 

As you start to look for the places that work for you, you'll build up your own favorite places. Do try to visit new places.

3) Review your old work

Sometimes going through your old work or rough drafts can rekindle an old spark or ignite a related idea. Follow the train of thought that first inspired you- either it will lead you somewhere new and exciting or you'll follow through on an old inspiration.

Re-drawing an old sketch can be great both for finding motivation and inspiration. 

Viewing how far I've come can really get me pumped up to try something new and challenging that I mightn't've tried without the warm up.

4) Talk to a friend

Talk to a friend about anything. Talk about the idea. Talk about the problem. Talk about your weekend plans. Talk, listen, discuss. 

I'm always amazed by how a good chat with a friend can make my day. And a good day for my heart is a good day for inspiration. 

Talking about what you're brainstorming for can knock all sorts of ideas out of your brain. There's something about verbalizing a problem that makes the problem more clearly defined and the answer a little more obvious.

Similarly, your friend will probably have their own spin to your idea that can improve it. Or make its error more clear. 

5) Work through it

Sometimes you just need to get going. This method is the toughest one. Once you've pushed through the first 5 minutes, working just gets easier. Is it something about inertia? Whatever it is, starting makes going easier.

Even if I'm still having difficulty working once I start, then I remind myself that I have made progress. More likely than not, I don't end up taking a break because getting the ball rolling is the hardest thing. 

Joy: Cat cafes in the USA

The positivity post for this week is about cat cafes.

Here's a link to a short article on cat cafes slowly making their way to the USA.

Has the time come for cat cafes in the U.S.?

 

I sure hope that the US gets some cat cafes in the North Eastern area; they'd really have all my money. 

There's a bit of hope from tumblr user catcafedream who is looking to start a cat cafe in Boston. 

The concept of these cat cafes hosting adoptable cats seems like a great idea to me, certainly a nice living space for the kitties than the average shelter.

Moving Forward From Failure: Get Started!

I find failure to be the most difficult thing to overcome. Maybe it's the fact that failure had such a high cost in my youth. Maybe it's just that failure represents the effort put into the attempt not being quite enough.

via: Left handed toons People don't actually laugh at our failures

But here's what I do to get over my fear of failure and get started on a project.

Mentally Approaching Failure 

During our youth, it seems that many of us were told that talent or intelligence meant never failing, having things come to us easily. Therefore, when we face difficulty or worse yet failure, we question one of the fundamentals of our identity: our talent. The ideology behind this comes from the concept of a Romantic genius, a person with natural talent whose work far exceeds what practice and route learning can achieve in the untalented.

But this is a silly notion. Even the Romantic geniuses had failures!
Friedrich did studies for his paintings; even The Wanderer had its precursor. Chalk Cliffs is nowhere near the statement as the The Wanderer. It's not a shame to the artist that he went through a process of refinement for his ideas. That's what failure is: the process of improvement.Van Gogh did not immediately paint a perfect canvas: often he painted over his failures, adapting them to the improvement of his next work.

Fear of Mockery

Our greatest fear seems to be that we will be laughed at or mocked for our failures.

Let's remember van Gogh. Most art historians lament that he painted over his "failures." They wish that they could see the process that he went through, much as they pour over the sketches of those painters trained by the French Academy.

And okay, somebody laughed at your failure? So what? What are they doing? Instead of taking that time to be improving themselves, they're paying attention to you. If anything, that means that you're already succeeding. You're gaining attention for your new work. You've got an audience for your future success. You're making someone else feel happy, maybe a vindictive happy that reflects on their inner demons, but still happy. So don't worry about it.

The Cost of Failure

"I spent so much time working on it but it didn't turn out right."
"Look at all the money that went into that ugly thing! What a waste."
"My reputation's ruined by that fiasco. No one will let me try again!"

We've all heard or said these things about our own efforts that ended in failure.

But what have we said about the profits of success?

Consider failures investments. Don't jump into large ones; slowly build. Develop a skill. It only takes a single success to put you on the market, but all success requires skill.

In the case of drawing: Start out on cheap newsprint as you learn to draw or paint. Invest in a few nice sketchbooks. When those are filled, you'll see improvement. You'll have the wisdom to choose the style and medium that best suits you. A few quality finished works on canvas will yield more and more knowledge, based on the sketches you continue to do on cheap paper. Finally, you'll have a piece that satisfies you. You can send this succes to a gallery where it may or may not be accepted. But you will always have the skill of drawing, a skill that can continue to grow.

How to Be More Awesome

I'm a big fan of MissJessicaHarlow. Seeing the opportunities that she's making for herself and opening for her fans is amazingly inspiring. Not to mention her fabulous sense of style and humour.

Check out her video on how to be more awesome!

Who's who at an internship

It can be really difficult to start a new job, especially an internship where you know that you will be relying on the good opinions of others to get recommendations or job offers.

Of course different organizations will have different people and different organizations of power. But this is a good rundown of who you'll probably meet at a your internship.

Read more to find out Who's Who at an internship and a few hints about who you are!

Intern supervisor

You've probably already had plenty of contact with this person in the process of getting your internship. The intern supervisor most likely is in charge of all of the interns in different departments.  This is the person that you should touch in with periodically; most likely they'll be the one that schedules your meetings and trainings. If your supervisor has any problems with you... well, the intern supervisor knows. And lets you know too.

The intern supervisor is also generally the person you go to if you are having any difficulties. If your access badge hasn't come or your supervisor is asking you to work 50 hours a week, you should talk to the intern supervisor about finding a solution. They serve as a good mediator between you and the larger company, making sure you get proper respect and treatment. The intern supervisor will also have final say over your recommendations and your review.

Direct supervisor

Your direct supervisor is whoever is in charge of the office you are in. This supervisor is the person who directly assigns you tasks. Some supervisors are happy to have interns and will truly take you under their wing. Others will see you as an imposition and do their best to ignore you, despite your desire to work. Still others will simply see you as another pair of hands and give you a never ending line up of dull tasks.

You don't have much control over how your supervisor decides to treat you. You do have control over how you react. Always be polite and professional. Do your best to ask for challenging work; when you complete a task, check with the supervisor that it has been done properly and ask for more work. If you are curious about something, take initiative to research it and then ask if that information is correct.Your direct supervisor will hopefully see your motivation and creativity as an addition to the office and take advantage of it.

Obviously, your direct supervisor is important: they are going to be the one giving you referrals and having a large say in the decision of whether to offer you an opportunity to return. Try to impress them by working hard and working smart! If you'll lucky, your supervisor will appreciate your dedication, fostering a great relationship.

Coworkers

You may have a closer relationship with others in your office. Having a coworker who has taken you under your wing or who you can consistently turn to for assignments can be a really great thing. I find that other coworkers who still remember what it's like to be an intern can offer a great working relationship. If you have questions about office politics or how to relate to your supervisor, your coworkers can be a good resource for such questions.

Do remember: Coworkers are still above you! Don't get too friendly with them or forget their place above you!

Also remember that coworkers have more loyalty to their supervisor than to you. If you choose to gossip about your boss to them, don't be surprise if that gets back to your boss. Offices are small places, made smaller when people get too cozy with one another. It's not bad to make friendships, but remember to respect the workers who are above you.

Fellow interns

I think that maybe the best thing about an internship is meeting other people. Your fellow interns are also at college, with an interest in same career field as you but they have a totally different perspective to offer you. Talking to fellow interns can give you a sense of what the field you're in is like, the personality of your future coworkers, and even inspire some pretty amazing goals for once you head back in the fall.

Being open and respectful to your fellow interns is the best thing you can do. Do your best to avoid competitive comparisons and instead focus on the common ground. If you're all in an unpaid internship, focus on exchanging tips for cheap lunch vendors or easy tutoring gigs rather than competing to see who has the best or worse living condition. Just being pleasant and constructive can go a long way.

After the internship is over, see if you can meet up with or at least email a few of the interns that you connected with. Ask them if they're doing alright, when they're moving back to campus or what they though of the internship. If you feel an honest connection, such an outreach could start a valuable friendship.

Volunteers or customers

On the offhand chance that your work will have you dealing with volunteers or customers, remember to be kind and generous with them. Be as helpful and respectful as possible to everyone, no matter how inane (or insane) they may seem. If they are a regular of the program, their input may be very important. Comments from customers or those who volunteer can mean a lot to a small organization- so a compliment for you from someone may be very valuable.

You may rank slightly above volunteers or be trusted to supervise them. But remember: you can get fired. A volunteer can't. So really, who's in a position of power? If you are put in charge of volunteers, try to be as polite and respectful as possible. And don't delegate everything to them.  Everything they do, you should do too and work twice as hard at it.

Who's Who and Who are you?

You are who you are. You are a hard working and motivated person- so show that off! Work hard while you have the opportunity. If you have a brilliant idea, work to make that idea have an impression on your company. Be the best that you can be and the world will take notice.

One thing that I would say: I know that a lot of people seem to think that networking is the end all be all. There's this image of networking as the ability to effortlessly charm hundreds of people and inquire on the intimate details of someone's life that you've gleaned from an office party. But that's really not how things work in an office. Networking is about the daily encounters: asking someone if they're alright when they're having a bad day or making the effort to offer to help with something when someone seems particularly stressed along with doing your work as well as you can.

10 Things You'll Love About Being Home on Break

Let's get back to the positive side after the post of 10 Things you'll miss about college on break!

Lesson: It's good to vent and verbalize the things that bother you, but refocus on the things that you enjoy. Figure out how to add more of the 10 things you love and remove the 10 things you don't.

Read more for the list of 10 things you'll love about being home!







These are the things that I love about being home:

1. Being with your family
2. Your own precious bed
3. Flipping motherfudger kid-cussing
4. Catching up with local friends
5. Avoiding dorm drama
6. Home cooked meals
7. Early bedtime and good rest
8. Your own bathroom to arrange as you like
9. Free laundry for your clothes
10. No stressful exams

There are so many great things about being home. Being in the place that you grew up and dreams up so many goals can really help to center you, give you energy to keep pursuing what you want to be doing.

10 Ways to Measure Personal Calm

Working toward calm and contentment is a lifelong pursuit; it requires that you pay attention to the signs of your body and the actions you take based on your emotional state. Like most long term goals, people need to be able to measure their progress. Even your breath can be a way to check in on your emotions, on how calm you are.

These 10 consistent actions and abilities will allow you to measure your progress as you work towards your own personal calm. 

Read more to discover 10 ways to measure your personal calm!

10 Ways to Measure Personal Calm

1. Crying or smiling based on your inner need to
2. Controlling your voice and volume
3. Maintaining calm regardless of others
4. Pursuing relaxing hobbies and activities that refresh you
5. Extending kindness
6. Breathing deeply from the diaphragm
7. Looking at the present with removal from the past
8. Acceptance of change
9. Investing in relationships rather than drama
10. Being in touch with body, self and soul

For example:

If during a crisis you are crying and taking short breaths, you have lost sight of your personal calm when you most need it. Your body is out of your control: you have let adrenaline and fear control you rather than holding on to your inner peace.

During an argument, keeping your voice at the even level you want it while accepting what the other person says rather than resisting the change they propose- this is a good sign of inner calm! 

Touching base with your body during moments of high stress can help you diagnose where you are emotionally and spiritually are. Compare these two examples and find where you lie on such a spectrum.

Additional Exercise 

Try making a list of things you do when calm and content. Don't think about what others would expect you to do; think of what works for you. Add that list to these goal posts

Rousseau: Perpetual restraint vs. Honest commitment

People seem to become more and more homogeneous as time goes on. Think of the rapid spread of galaxy print. Quickly galaxy went from a few instances of NASA photoshopping, to a DIY trend, and on to widespread commercial products. Maybe it's the success of corporations managing to sell us all the same product in a million different ways. Maybe it's the process of information becoming more quickly and widely available.

via Britannica

Even in the 18th century process of people trying to fall into a mold was happening. Rousseau writes in Discourses on the Arts and Sciences on the prevalence of modern manners.

Read more for a quote of his ideas and my thoughts on individuality despite outside pressure.

The Quote

"In our day, now that more subtle study and a more refined taste have reduced the art of pleasing to a system, there prevails in modern manners a servile and deceptive conformity; so that one would think every mind had been cast in the same mould. Politeness requires this thing; decorum that; ceremony has it s forms, and fashion its laws, and these we must always follow, never the promptings of our own nature.

We no longer dare seem what we really are, but lie under a perpetual restraint; in the meantime the herd of men, which we call society, all act under the same circumstances exactly alike, unless very particular and powerful motives prevent them. Thus we never know with whom we have to deal; and even to know our friends we must wait for some critical and pressing occaison; that is, till it is too late; for it is on those very occasions that such knowledge is of use to us."

from Rousseau, A Discourse on the Arts and Sciences, The First Part

Homogenization by Choice

What is certain is that the homogenization make individuality more difficult. It's hard to be your unique self when everyone else seems to have poured themselves into a single cast. I remember in high school when everyone wore Abercrombie and Fitch, capped sleeves and color scheme down to a precise formula. Now, the uniform is more subtle and encroaches on behavior.

There prevails in modern manners a servile and deceptive conformity

Apparently, it's absolutely not okay to not have a plan for after graduation as a freshman nor is it alright to purchase your brass rat after graduation, even if these decisions are based on your finances. If you've ever worn a costume on the T, the adult uniform is revealed by its absence. The conformity is deceptive in how everyone seems to easily fall into it, willingly. But it's there.

So how do you break out of the mold that's been made invisible by ubiquity?
How does one stand up for their individuality while still being presentable for interviews?

Unique Self

Part of embracing the everyday is embracing who you are. Get in touch with what you want then work to pursue that. The persistence to follow your dream will also show your value as an individual amongst so many identical replicates. Get in touch with the powerful motives that will give you strength to be yourself. Once you have a goal, pursue it regardless of decorum. If you want to be more fashionable, try out new coordinates regardless of what dullards warn about changing your style. Reach out to communities that pursue the similar styles; don't be afraid of being the first person to speak.

Valuable Friends

Let go of friends that don't stand by you. Friends who haven't stayed with you aren't guaranteed friends. Don't go out creating a crisis. Do pay attention to who comforts you, even in the small things. Trust me: those people will also show up when you truly need it.

Thus we never know with whom we have to deal; and even to know our friends we must wait for some critical and pressing occaison; that is, till it is too late; for it is on those very occasions that such knowledge is of use to us.

People who share your goal will make useful allies and even better friends; you know they will stay strong beside you because they too have gone through the difficulty of breaking out of the mediocre. Most likely, they'll be far more welcoming and warm as you discuss something exciting you both love than those bound by polite conversation about the weather.

Reading Rousseau on this subject gave me confidence and I hope that it can give you confidence too. Being yourself can give you a lot of insight on the true friends in your life. Don't worry about people that are uncomfortable with you embracing yourself. Be open and honest with your advice. The true friends are the people that stick around and care while others ignore or try to disparage you.

Motivate Yourself: What is Work?

I think we all have days where we just can't do any work.

But that doesn't mean that day is a loss. Sometimes you can trick yourself into getting "work" done. Other times you just need to realize how much work you're already doing.

I'll share a few tricks for getting yourself into getting stuff done when your body just won't cooperate.

Set the mood

Often the reason I can't get work done is because of a bad or lazy mood. To deal with a lack of motivation, let's first qualify what it means to get work done. There are all sorts of tasks that need to get done in a day. Some of them are chores; others are complex creative tasks; others are matters of routine. Some relaxing but necessary tasks we don't even consider when making our to-do lists: showering, eating, cooking, taking a moment for breathing. But all of these things need to happen in a day.

It seems ridiculous to de-value the things that have to get done. Without going grocery shopping and cooking food, you'd starve. Shouldn't that make those tasks the most important part of your day?

Do chores

I find that the reason I can't focus on a large academic "important" task is because I've allowed too many of these "little" chores pile up. In that sense too we can see that everyday chores are important and part of getting work done. Without keeping up on chores and self-care, we can lose our motivation for larger tasks.

Try out these physical chores with the intended mental goals in mind.

• Cleaning your room
• Refocus and de-clutter your mind
• Open up your windows to let in sunlight
• Brighten your outlook
• Wash and dry dishes
• Drift on what you need to do
• Throw away old lists and papers
• Prioritize the things left 
• Empty the trash can
• Let go of baggage
• Do laundry
• Focus and pacing

Pacing

Work is not sitting in one place for hours and hours. The Social Network might show us people "plugging in" for hours at a time, but most people don't work this way. The human body isn't designed to sit in one place for a long time; cramped and tired out is usually the end result of this type of studying and work. So don't study in a way that physically saps motivation and sets you up to fail!

Study to your body's needs and personal habits

Most people can only concentrate on a task for 45 minutes which is about the time a load of laundry takes. After a block of time concentrating, take a break to do a physical activity to pump your body back up and keep yourself from getting tired. This will help your motivation.

Rousseau: Life to the Fullest

Understanding the education is preparation for life, we can now figure out how to embrace that life. Sometimes it can be very difficult to create an approach to life that allows you to embrace the moment. Hearing peers anxiously talk about grad school in their freshman years or professors drone on about the impenetrability of academia can make it seem like life takes place in stretches of decades rather than days. But your life is made of days!

Fortunately, there are great minds who have already written about the focus on the day to day life, and the benefits to embracing daily joy. Let's look at a quote from Rousseau, on of the great thinkers from the 18th century. His writings on education will help us to better understand what an effect positivity can have on us, as we approach our life and our education. 

Read more for wisdom on embracing your day!

You can read the first part at Rousseau: Education to the Fullest.

Let's continue with the Rousseau quote and finding a way to embrace the day to day.

The Quote

"We think only of preserving his life and limb. It is not enough; he ought to be taught how to preserve them himself when he is grown up; to endure the shocks of fortune, to bear riches or poverty, and to live, if occasion required, amid the snows of Iceland or on the burning rocks of the Malta. [...] It is of less moment to preserve him from death than to teach him how to live. To live is not merely to breather; it is to act, to make proper use of our organs, our senses, our faculties, and all parts of our being which contribute to our consciousness of life. he has not had most life who has lived most years, but he who has felt life the most. A man may be buried a hundred years old and have died in his cradle. Such a one would have gained by dying in youth if had lived till then." (Rousseau on Education, Introductory Passages from the "Emilie," Part 2. Education and the state)

Education as a Lifestyle

Education is about the here and now. Put in your very best into every aspect of what you're learning. Reach out to professors and jump at opportunities. Education isn't about sitting back in a lecture hall and letting it happen to you. Education is an action, one that requires persistent effort from all of our faculties. Sometimes it's tiring; you may feel like you're putting yourself out there, asking "stupid" questions or sending out applications that others wouldn't dare to try for. But that's an education!

Reaching out for knowledge and passion from your education is your education. Even when your hand falls short, you've gone farther and learned more than the people who didn't dare to reach.

Embracing the Moment

It's very important to focus on living life in the moment. I think that what makes each day valuable is appreciating the small moments. Enjoy every day and take advantage of the opportunities that the small times present. Even if it's just having dinner with a friend or finishing a book that seemed to take forever to get through, these are valuable achievements and memories. Your life isn't just major events or waiting for the next "big thing." Instead of putting off adventure, embrace it. Heck, go out there and create it! Certainly there will be failures, not everything is an exciting success the first time. Those failures are opportunities to laugh and learn, a skill which will serve you well as life changes constantly.


Don't wait for a perfect moment to start living; that moment doesn't exist before you put effort into creating it. 

Positivity: Education to the Fullest from Rousseau

Walking through the Infinite, I'm always amazed by the project posters and the chatter of discovery that surrounds MIT. I love the feeling of excited and frenzied exploration that permeates the people, the very buildings.

But there's something that makes me a little anxious: the concept of a technology education  Some of my peers see their time here as a way to gather up data points to store and recite for accolades. Others see technology as unequivocally good, unquestioning of the pursuit of knowledge and a fancy career. And there's always the disparaging of HASS, class that focus on the humanities. I can't count how many times have I been told that "readings for HASS classes are optional" or that "there's aren't any jobs in that; it's useless."

Something has changed about the way we approach education. We seem to see education as a decoration for our resume rather than a way to see the world.

(image via stephenhicks)

Read more for Rousseaus' vision of education as a way to impact individuals.

Education for Society

Let's look to a quote from Rousseau's writings on education. Please consider that all of your life is an education, a preparation for the next day to come and a way to prepare future generations with the wisdom you have gained. When Rousseau wrote of education, he wrote of education as the process from childhood that would structure and prepare young people who would form society. Always, he thought of the effect education would have on the society as a whole, a society in line with the ideals of antiquity. 

Ideal Education

Rousseau had the idea that education should return to the earlier style of the Romans, removing children from theoretical academics (which he saw as useless ego stroking) and instead allowing young people to pursue their interests whole heartedly and with lots of hands on experience. He wanted to grant poor students scholarships that would be proudly awarded. Education was meant to enrich people morally and mentally, always a tool rather than a decoration.

Education included the mind and body. Physical education and a connection to nature were very important to Rousseau; he felt that competitive and group athletics in the outdoors would improve students and their communities. Rousseau thought that the whole community should gather to honor athletes and encourage young people to work together in sports. This would build the community and help people to see their ideals of leadership, sacrifice, and cooperation in action.

The Quote

"We think only of preserving his life and limb. It is not enough; he ought to be taught how to preserve them himself when he is grown up; to endure the shocks of fortune, to bear riches or poverty, and to live, if occasion required, amid the snows of Iceland or on the burning rocks of the Malta. [...] It is of less moment to preserve him from death than to teach him how to live. To live is not merely to breather; it is to act, to make proper use of our organs, our senses, our faculties, and all parts of our being which contribute to our consciousness of life. he has not had most life who has lived most years, but he who has felt life the most. A man may be buried a hundred years old and have died in his cradle. Such a one would have gained by dying in youth if had lived till then." (Rousseau on Education, Introductory Passages from the "Emilie," Part 2. Education and the state)

Meaning and Focus

Let's focus on the first section of the quote:

He ought to be taught how to preserve himself when he is grown up; to endure the shocks of fortune, to bear riches or poverty.

This is not what our college education does! That's not even how most people approach education!

Most people approach education as a way to get a well paid career or as a marker of the upper middle class. But really education should be so much more than that. Think of the great Greek thinkers: Plato and Socrates certainly wrote, debated, and educated for the young men of the elite. But they spoke to these men with questions, in order to change society and to give these men the means by which to live and find their own understandings.

Rousseau is suggesting the same thing: education should prepare young people for life with a style of thinking rather than a collection of datums.

Education's purpose isn't to make money or a sparkling career. Education has the purpose of preparing us to live our lives regardless of money. An education is supposed to make us consider the role that money plays in our lives. A good education should give us a sustainable approach to life, one that we can live in the ups and downs of life.

Because there will always be ups and downs, education should teach us how to ride life; no number of degrees can protect us from uncertainty or fragility.  

In the next section, we'll turn to the second part of Rousseau's quote.

Fresh Plants and Flowers

I love spring time. I love the way the weather warms up and then takes the time for little spring showers to cool down. We should all take the time to slow down. Going on long walks helps me to breath in that fresh air that gives so much life to everything. Keeping live plants at my desk really warms up my study space, but I sometimes want flowers along with my leafy green. I want to bring into my room more of the spring that is around me.

I've been getting cut flowers to keep in my room. Read more to see the flowers that I've been getting and hear about my experience.



I adored having these flowers in my room. I don't know what it is exactly about flowers that makes my mood soar, but there is something. If I could figure out what it was, I'd bottle it up and use it for every day.

I get flowers at either the grocery store or at the florist. Fortunately, I have coupons for the florist. For those of you worried about cost, most cut flowers last about for one or two weeks. By changing the water regularly with sugar added in, you can extend the flower's lifespan to a tad over two weeks.

My one warning would be that cut flowers have pollen in them. That might seem obvious, but if you have allergies it could be a problem, especially in a small room. Ask the florist which flowers don't have too much pollen.

End of Term

It's absolutely amazing to think that it's the end of the semester. Next year I will be a junior! There are so many exciting things to talk about: an exciting summer job, studying for exams, packing for a return to Virginia.

Due to finals there won't be any more posts until after May 24th, when I return to Virginia. After that, I will return to schedule.

Read more for my thoughts on the end of term and summer plans.

Semester Wrap Up: Academics

To think that I'm half-way through my college career is crazy. I just can't believe it; it feels like the time is flying past me. Truth: college takes a lot of sustained work and concentrated dedication. I've felt the wear down of the year when winter was in its coldest, but as the weather warmed up so did I. Not to mention the lift that my floor mates and friends provided. I'm intensely grateful for the friends that I've made. For them and myself, I want to keep up the effort and the energy for the next two years, staying focused on making myself happy and learning rather than weakly stumbling through.

Finals are something that I start prepping for at the start of May, so I'm not drowning in cramming. However there was a major surprise from MIT about Random Hall going through construction and Bexley being closed for the next couple of years. This threw me off schedule for studying. I have a take home exam, a final, and two papers to write. Most of my things are organized to be packed up. Taking the time to pack up also means taking the time to purge my room of things I don't adore. For the summer, I'm going to be storing my things at a paid storage facility; thankfully, MIT should be covering this cost.

Gratitude: The Year as a Gift

There's so much that I'm grateful for, even as I struggle through finals and packing and all the things that come with the wrap up of the year. The winding down of the year puts so many things into perspective. My low points this year are also a way to get back down to my foundation.

So many opportunities and knowledge have come to me, but through this year my goal has been to acknowledge these opportunities as a gift. No one is owed anything so to be gifted kindness, knowledge, and kinship is something really valuable. Easy to overlook, but difficult to find. I've been focusing on improving myself, reading and breathing to appreciate what I have.

This year, every day of it, has been a gift. Low points and high points are part of the process of living; I want to appreciate them as an opportunity for growth and self-possesion.

Upcoming Summer: Work and Play

My summer job is an internship with the Smithsonian American Art. Link through to read about the summer program internship for SI American Art. I'm so excited for this amazing opportunity. There's no way for me to express how much it means to me to be stepping forward toward my dream of working in a museum, to be working with art and towards the purpose of preservation, outreach, and education. I adore the Smithsonian and can basically guarantee that I'll spend my summer gushing about it. If you're also interested in this type of work: Check out the Smithsonian's page for summer internships. 

I'm thinking of getting a part time work-from-home job since the Smithsonian internship isn't paid. I'd like to have something to give me a little bit of spending money and some savings to start off my junior year.

For play, I'm going to be having some of my college friends over. I've already got the full plans for a friend coming over for Otakon! Link to read about Otakon, an amazing anime convention in Baltimore, Maryland. This summer will be my third year attending. Another friend may be dropping by sometime during the summer since she fell a bit in love with Virginia after visiting for Thanksgiving.Also, I'm considering going to see Motion City Soundtrack for their concert July 9th at Virginia Beach.

Summer Blogging

With an increased amount of free time, I want to work on my blog. I really want to step it up to the next level. My goals are to create a banner, signature, line break, and maybe even  an extra feature for each week. I'd really like to work on my graphic design and art; utilizing that toward the blog would give me a good schedule and motivation.

I would also like to get back into Youtube and creating videos. It's something that I've always enjoyed but don't seem to block out time for.

If there's anything you want to see in the blog or from me in general, please let me know!

Positivity: Spring walks

Moving into May, the weather is finally cooperating with me. I've retired my winter jacket for the year, and brought out some bright spring clothes. More than just revamping my wardrobe, I've been revamping my everyday routines.

For positivity, I've been focusing on walking around in the fresh spring weather.

Read more to welcome spring with me.

Bring Spring Indoors

The key to embracing spring is being out in spring. It starts with opening the windows and buying some fresh fruit. Then I move on to getting fresh flowers. But the real key, the thing that really makes me feel a brighter way, is walking outside.

Look Around Outside

Of course, enjoying your walk outside requires you to look around. Don't just be a member of the fading city in Phantom Tollbooth; look up from your feet while you walk. You don't have to smile at anybody if you don't want to.

Just enjoy the space that you're walking through. If you love your city, appreciate the architecture and bustling people. If you hate your city, look up at the sky and focus on the landscaping. If you love your rural campus, enjoy the wide greens and trees. If you hate the rural, walk around campus close to most of the buildings and guess how many floors each building has.

I used to hate the construction work outside of the Metropolitan Storage, but I started to laugh about it. Seeing the building get cleaner and fresher was what I focused on rather than the dust raining down. Take a different point of view.

Create an Outdoor Routine

Add walks to the everyday routine. Instead of walking across campus inside, I choose to take the outdoor path. If you carpool or ride the subway, try biking for a week. Try walking to the next stop on the route if you take the bus or subway, just to get in a little walking.

Sometimes the outdoor route is a longer route than the "inside" a car/building/subway route. The weather's not guaranteed to be a pleasant 73 degree for your walk so make sure you check to have a the right gear for the weather.

Spring into Adventure

But each walk always gives me a little bit of a smile. It's the risk of rain that makes each morning a little adventure. Walking outside is amazing for your happiness level and relaxation.

Positivity: Spring Refresh

I want to see how my new year's resolutions have been going, possibly recommitting on the ones that aren't doing as well on.

Read more for the break down on how I've been doing!

• Draw Every Day

I haven't been doing so well on this. But I have been drawing more often than last semester. I'm even nearly through with my sketch book. Overall, I think that this goal might need to be broken down a little bit more so that I can measure my progress on it.

• Blog Post Weekly

I have been doing this. In fact, I've been blogging twice weekly. I think that I may step it up to three times a week in a month or so. Blogging is really rewarding and works well with my self reflection. While I may not have a lot of readers now, I feel accountable writing down what I have and haven't done.

• Work Out

This semester I'll be taking a yoga and pilates class this term. I'm a little worried about the pilates, but I'll have a friend with me. I'm going to be trying to attend the Friday Concourse Yoga. I tried to have a work out buddy for working out in my dorm, but we were stymied by conflicting schedules, so I may just work out on my own in the Z-center.

• Cook and Pack Lunches

I've actually been been staying in the dorm for lunch, so I haven't been having to pack up. I do think that I should be cooking more. It'll be easier to do this as the weather warms up and grocery shopping becomes less of a chore.

• Confidence Increase

Maybe my confidence has increased. Seems like I am more content with myself, most likely due to the self reflection I've been focusing on. I feel much happier with the choices that I've been making, especially since it seems like I'm moving closer to my goal.

• Morning Yoga

Not too well on this resolution. I'm going to re-commit to this for the spring. I think this will also help with the difficulty I have getting out of bed. This links back to the working out resolution, so hopefully they'll rise together. 

• Talk to Ivanna x2 weekly

I have been doing very well on this. I write a letter every week and usually make a phone call or text throughout the week. To step up the commitment, I want to start taking a photo once a week to text to her which would also work well for blogging.

• Drink 8 cups of water / day

While I may not be all the way up to 8 cups a day, I have consistently been drinking water before going the sleep and right after waking up. I think I'm averaging 6 cups a day, focused in the evening. To be quite honest, I feel like I need to drink far more than 8 cups a day. 

• Keep My Room Clean

Victory! My room has actually been getting cleaner and neater. I emptied and condensed a number of things, leading to less clutter overall. If I can keep this up for the spring, I may reward myself by buying another small dresser for my beauty supplies and pajamas.

Overall, I feel that I've been doing well on my new year's resolutions. I am adding a few more resolutions, stepping it up a little bit.

Drifting From Your Values: Safe Space

When you go to college, it may be the first time that you encounter opinions radically different from your own. At the very least, college will likely be the first time that you don't have your home to return to; your parents and their support network likely won't be there in your dorm room to reassure you after a day of facing unfamiliar values. Losing that safe recuperating space can be really tough and stressful to deal with, especially when you want to replenish yourself.

Here are some ideas to find a safe space to refocus on your values.

Your room

Talk to your roommate to make sure that your room is a good place to recoup after a day. Having a safe place to return to refresh yourself and your values is really important. For example, if you don't agree with the college party scene, talk to your roommate about not playing loud house music late at night. Or if you don't believe in premarital sex, talk to your roommate about respecting your blissful ignorance of the sex when she "sexiles" you.

Recognize that you're not going to get everything you want from your roommate. Likely, the two of you will come to a compromise that isn't perfect but better than none at all.

Safe Spaces on Campus

If your room can't be a safe space, see if you can find a safe space on campus. A lot of colleges have women only safe spaces. There are also LGBTQ friendly spaces cropping up in more and more campuses; it's so great to see this time of progress. For religious folk, your faith probably has an area church and your campus probably has an interfaith chapel.  You can read this Tech article about the value of the MIT Women's Lounge. MIT also has the Rainbow Lounge.

Library 

I often find that reserving library study room for a few hours of self-contemplation is a good way to refresh and recenter myself. Sometimes I bring a book that describes my values; other times I just think about what has been drifting me from what I want to do. It's a very difficult process to return to what you hold in your heart when everyone else seems to be doing something different.

You may have a different group of friends, with different values, from different places. I know that I felt encouraged to try things I'd never even heard of before coming to MIT; some of the things I ended up really liking, while others I absolutely hated.

Staying positive: Lookin' Good

I've realized that a major part of me feeling good about myself is based on feeling that I look good. This spring and summer, my goal is work a routine of healthy self care and trying out a new more outgoing personal style.



Read more to hear about my rationale for this new commitment and the steps that I've broken this major goal down into.




I was raised on the belief that "cleanliness is close to godliness" and that "your body is a temple," so I associate taking care of my body with taking care of my soul. I may not be as spiritual, but the feeling of being clean is still linked with a sense of personal peace and reflection for me. I often spend my shower planning out my day or revving myself up for class.

Looking back on my low points, I see that personal care is one of the first things that I cut out. The sad thing is that removing self care makes it difficult for me to go out and leads to debilitating self criticism. While the first thing to go, self care certainly isn't the last. Cutting down on self care is a rather common thing for people suffering from depression or even just general stress. If you struggle with this, there's a lot of support out there. Even if it's not part of a serious difficulty, it's easy to rationalize exchanging showering time for cramming for a test. Maybe we can challenge ourselves to take better care together!

This year, I made a commitment to improving myself and I catalogued those resolutions in my day planner.
( Read my improvement commitments here.)

I want to commit to looking nice, taking care of my appearance, so that I can tackle the world with a more outgoing personality.

• My goal is to shower daily, taking the time to shampoo, condition, exfoliate, and just enjoy the process of getting clean.
• I will try to do my hair well, so that I feel confident with it. 
• I want to wear make up on a regular basis rather than "giving up" on my appearance. 
• My outfits will be things I confidently enjoy rather than things that let me feel slouchy-comfortable. 
• I will take advantage of my clothes and jewelry that I own. 
• I should try to feel brave and adventurous trying out new clothes, rather than cautious.